Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Randomize
