The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
