im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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