He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
