I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
