Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
