I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
