Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
