I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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