he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
