She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize