It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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