Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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