Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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