Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize