Don't you send me to vm
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Randomize
