That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
