How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i just sent this text using only my big toe
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
