He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
