We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
