He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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