Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
