I think I just saw someone hide a body.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
