ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
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