i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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