I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
