I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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