Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
