So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
