wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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