So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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