Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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