community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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