I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
