well most of my day revolves around power hour
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
