Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
