FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Randomize