It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Randomize
