Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize