i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize