I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
