happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
