I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
