I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I lost the right to judge tonight
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
