the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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