if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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