just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
