I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
