It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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