trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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